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THE STRAIGHT POOP

content discovered on Tuesday, November 28, 2017 in living in denial optimism

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsIf you got outta bedthis morningyou're an optimistplain and simpleotherwise why would you?I mean reallyyou're getting readyto do your thinggoin' to workgoin' to playgoin' to get drunkand the sun is shiningand the birds are tweeting( many of them have Twitter accounts)and you just don't think abouthow it can all turn toshitwithout a moment's noticelike the snap of your fingersWe live in denialabout the true nature of lifeand the turning to shit factorwe just get up every da...

GOD BLESS

content discovered on Sunday, November 19, 2017 in ego immortal soul sunday morning

3 a.m. on a Sundayand I'm tradin' sleep for a poemthinking 'bout all the folkswho will don their Sunday fineryto hang out in a pewwith you and you and youand youstill don't get itthat your soul is immortaland not in need of savin'but sureI get itit's a sense of communitywe gather together to askthe Lord's blessingand even though I'm fallin' apartin my decrepitudeI'm good to go with all of thatdon't feel the needcuz a coupla peeps singing loudly off keyon either side of meisn't exactly what I call "inspir...

THIS THING

content discovered on Tuesday, November 14, 2017 in a beginning a thing chance discovery the unknown

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsSometimessomething is therewaiting for youyou don't know what it isyou have to see ittouch itsmell ityou have to find outwhat it isand what it's going to doto youor for youyou won't know that until yousee ittouch itsmell itand even then you will likelyhave only a clueyou have toplay with itlet it touch you backgah damnwhat is it?how did I find it?you didn'tit was just therewaiting for youthough you may have walkedby it a thousand times beforehead buried in your phone(read ...

IN PRAISE OF LONELINESS

content discovered on Tuesday, November 7, 2017 in comfortable ruts loneliness pain transience

Imaginary Garden With Real Toads Easy comeeasy goI've watched the parademarch in and out my doorthe flute playersand the drummersthe only thing they sharein commonis their transiencewhile I play the silent monolithstoicwith eyes that mustnot waterI see the coupleswhen I'm out and aboutso many of them lookmismatched to mebut at least they've got something(a roll of fat maybe)to hang onto through the nightbeen in that comfortable rutbeforeand a comfortable rutis still a rutwithironicallyless and less rutt...

BETWEEN THE LINES

content discovered on Tuesday, October 3, 2017 in body odor burnt souffle sucky poetry

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsHeyI dunno how to tell you thisbut your poem sucksand so do youHa hayou know I'm kidding, right?I'm a real kidder, ya knowOh, and that souffle you madethe other night for the potluckyou BURNT itand it tasted like shit!Aw...go on...you know me...it was DELICIOUSAnd while we're at itI've been meaning to mention thatYOUhave been outlasting yourDEODORANTif you get what I meanHa haoh manI'm such a kiddera regular Don Rickles in cheap clothingYou know you always smell like a ros...

GOODBYE IRMA (HELLO DOLLY)

content discovered on Tuesday, September 12, 2017 in dolly parton evil doers flat earth hurricane irma intelligence mother nature stupidity

Imaginary Garden With Real Toadsbummerin da summerand you think it's all beenengineeredin some formor fashiondon't you?while one faction (the "Evil Ones")grows more intelligentto the point where they canmanufacture a monster stormand pinpoint it to destroy countless livesas a form of population control(or so you say)and another side grows stupiderrarin' to drag us back to the middle ageswhen the earth was flat(but you still loved your cat)you know whatI'll take all of your theorieswith a jumbo shaker of ...

NOW I AM YOURS

content discovered on Tuesday, August 29, 2017 in butterfly effect peaches responsible fondling

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsI squeezed a peachat the marketto size up its suitabilityand then began to move on to anotherwhen I heard it saySTOPyou have taken liberties with meand it was trueI had fondled itexcessivelyit saidnow I am yourstake me home and eat meand I thoughthow callous one would beto refuse a plea such as thatfrom just about...anyoneI guessso I put the peach in my bagand took it homeand now I am waitingfor just the right momentto consummate our relationship(I know it's going to be ju...

MILO, THE SHIT BIRD

content discovered on Tuesday, August 8, 2017 in bird crap poetic justice revenge

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsOh SHIT, man!" said Jerry. "Something just went SPLAT on top o' my head."Ben looked up. He heard the flutter of wings and a strange otherworldly cackle.Jerry said, "What the hell was that, man?"Ben stared at him, deadpan. "I think you've just been hit by Milo, The Shit Bird.""Milo The Shit Bird...wha-?"Ben fished around inside his lunch pail to find a paper napkin for Jerry--the glob of excrement perched atop his buddy's hair growing more pungent by the moment. "He's legen...

ZIGZAG

content discovered on Tuesday, August 1, 2017 in cherokee blood sherman alexie trans racial transgender zigzagging through life

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsNo tracks within a goodten miles of herebut on a misty mornthat hornis ridin' the breezecutting through my brain fogit echoeslike the call of the wildfrom back in the dayI shouldn't have switched onthe TVcuz some Trumpster shillis telling Martha Radditzwho the "normal" Americans arepretty sure Caitlyn isn't on his listI traveled all this waydoin' the transcontinental zigzagjust to end up in a world wheretransgender crapperswould be the hot button of the dayyou can bewhatev...

NO QUESTIONS ASKED

content discovered on Saturday, July 22, 2017 in somebody anybody

Bet U didn't think aboutwhy you're withU-NO-HOOtodayand betcha didn't reflect on whyyou're even withU-NO-HOOyesterday eithermaybe U thought about itway back when for a bitbut hey U got somebodyand so U do it by rotecuz somebodyis better than nobodyright?maybemeI don't need nobodyjust to have somebodyaroundbut if I ever doI'll dig up the onethat's in the back yard

SERVE AND PROTECT

content discovered on Tuesday, July 18, 2017 in abuse of power apartheid authority

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsApartheid never endedhere in A-me-ricait just got more subtlethe arbitrary traffic stopfor the flickering tail lightthat quickly escalatesintolife or deathis payback for your sippingfrom the wrong water fountainfor lo these many years now...and a sympathetic jury of his peersfrom kin-dee-garden ontrained to revereand respectthe badgethe uniformthe flagand indeed any symbol of authorityunder any and all circumstanceslikely as not will let him offif he remembers to say those...

WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE

content discovered on Tuesday, July 11, 2017 in lowering our standards madonna monkey mind

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsIt started with Madonnanow it's monkey seemonkey dofollow the formulait's tried and trueAnd the law of the junglecomes down from on highin 140 characterseach day(but it's beneath...the planet of the apes)did u get a bad rapor are u just a bad rapper?it's still up to us to decidewhat is culturaland what is just plain crassand the next Madonna wannabeis up on your big screentwerking her assin your faceand somebody is calling it artand that's what's wrongwith your generationr...

THE TICKET

content discovered on Tuesday, June 27, 2017 in element of surprise henry miller pancakes paris the middle path tilda swinton

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsHenry Miller went hungry a lotin Parisbut he fed enough bloodto his bitteto summon command performanceson a regular basisyou can't gain an advantageby lining up in the neutral zoneshow me somethingI haven't seenlike Tilda Swinton's titflashed in a movieI can't remember the name ofbut it was good(partially because of that)what if everyone woke up at the same time?(think of all the pancakes that would have to be made)trynot to get too highor too lowas they are both impostors...

FULL FRONTAL LONELY

1.You think that you've written downthe thoughtsthat were lonelierthan all the thoughtsthat were written down before youor after youbut you are wrong2.I'm reading some poems by Jewel(don't smirk--she's "intriguing")I am toldI'm adored by millionsbut no one callsand one can only thinkthen...what chance have I?3.Poets never say what they meanthey just expect you to figure it out4.Maybethat's why you're alone(even in a crowd)as they've all given upontrying to figure you out5.Opaqueisn't that intriguingto th...

AT LONG LAST

content discovered on Tuesday, June 13, 2017 in defining moments gender bender the goldfinch writers

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsI like womenwho write like menand men who writelike womensomewhere in the middlethey meetin a smoky androgynous hazewhere they size(and feel)each other upcomingat long lastto their definingmomentwith no compulsionfor going under the knife

HIGH SCHOOL YEARBOOK

content discovered on Tuesday, June 6, 2017 in dorks geeks high school me reverie

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsSome lookreally geekysome lookreally dorkyand a fewso arrogantlyself-assuredbut I was thereand I knowthat was whistlingthrough the graveyard

COUCH TOMATO

content discovered on Thursday, May 18, 2017 in blind dates irony psychiatry

d'Verse Poets PubI once met a psychiatriston a blind dateand as we sat therewith our drinksI tried to see what was in her eyesand what they revealed aboutwhat she was thinking aboutmebut as it turned outshe liked meand wanted to see me againand I went round and roundin my head about thatas in if we started up with each otherwould she be constantly psychoanalyzing me(why should I care if it's free?)but in the end I decided I'd feeltoo self-conscious in that scenariowhich is weird cuzit was all the rest of...

DAY AT THE PARK

content discovered on Tuesday, May 16, 2017 in fear love low riders soapbox preacher stairway to heaven

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsFrom your soapboxyou're out to save the worldyour words echoingthrough the parkvying with bouncynorteno tunes blasting fromlow rider car stereosyour nebulous foreverbuilt upon a city of hopehope against hopewhen you're danglingat the end of a ropebut what if I told youthat everything thing we dois motivated by eitherfearorloveand that we can easily chooseone or the otherand that you stem from a long lineof fear mongersover generationsand generationsof fear mongersspitting ...

HARD

content discovered on Tuesday, May 9, 2017 in dumb shit dumb waiter dumbed down dumbfounded dumbing of america

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsIt's getting harder to find...someone who isn't twentyhas half a brainhas an attention span of more than 10 secondsIt's getting harder to find...someonewho can name one former presidentbesides George Lincoln and Abraham Washingtonwho won't call you "honey" at the checkout linewho remembers what I just said even if I can'tIt's getting harder to find...someonewho can usetotootwoproperly in a sentencewho hasn't been spotted at Wal-Martwith a way too outrageous Brazilian butt ...

GUSHER

content discovered on Tuesday, April 18, 2017 in old faithful randomness the muse

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsYou think this is allrandombut even slot machinesare programmedto spill their gutsat predetermined intervals...the only truly random thingis the poetand his museand when that gushermay be gettin' ready to blowso stand backladies and gentlemenbecause there's one now(you can spot him by thattormented look in his eye)as we move within rangeit's advised that you prudentlycover your headswe have pith helmets for salein the gift shop

ALTERNATE EXPLANATION

content discovered on Friday, April 7, 2017 in

dVerse Poets PubThat roach on the bathroom floorwas flat on its backso I figured it was fixin' to die(not always the case with humans similarly positionedwith a randy look in their eye)respecting its process(I've read Kafka)I left it in peacefiguring tomorrow I'd give ita proper burialafter darkin the neighbor's yardbut when I went in thereit had up and disappearedapparently righting itselfat some pointand hauling asswhich told me somethingafter I thought about it'bout never counting anyone outeven when ...

ALL THIS WAY

content discovered on Tuesday, April 4, 2017 in

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsA birthday boy's tendencyis to replay everythingagainst the purplesand pistachios of springThe little white liesfrom another timeThe past recedinglike the ass-end of a trainfrom which you've just disembarkedAncient phrasesinside another eternityand of no import nowthe greater truths ignoredfor sake of our little tete a tetesToday I ponder the world's disastersthe worst of which is adding another digitto that chronological catastropheI fondly refer to as meEveryone gets a r...

PARDON MY FRENCH

content discovered on Tuesday, March 28, 2017 in

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsSometimes, for politeness sake(or goodness sake)I try to come up with a euphemismfor the "F" wordbut nothing seems to fit(pardon the pun)I've tried fu*kbut that smacks too muchof the hand of a censor for my tastesThere's fugg(as in"muddah fugga")but that's a little too streetand I can't claim a lotta street cred(though I've slept there a time or two)Then there's fooka bit too British, old chap("put thatfookingthing downbefore you hurt yourself!")And a myriad of old standby...

GOLDEN

content discovered on Tuesday, March 21, 2017 in

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsOn a sun-splashed dayin a desertwhere the Horse With No Namemade his claim to fameWith spring making overtureslike a punch-drunk loverI saw herin my mind's eyeI heard herin my mind's earI contemplated herin my mind's belly buttonBehold The Vagabond Princesselectric rays sparkingfrom the tips of her golden hairshe's been thereand backon a beach with some nameAnd all because sunshine camesoftly through her window that daySwaying to the beatof a distant drummerher gaze is loc...

ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE???

content discovered on Tuesday, February 21, 2017 in

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsWould I appear more attractive to you...If I were bravely shot out of a cannonand landed in a mangled heapjust short of the straw pile?Would I appear more attractiveif I wore flannel shirts a size too big(with shoulder pads beneath)and had a beard(oop, I have a beard)and went out each morningwith a big ol' axeto single-handedly chop down the rain forest?Or, say, if I held my wine glasswith my pinky extendedand gushed about "finish"and "bouquet?"Would I appear more attracti...

THE FOURTEENTH OF NOWHERE

content discovered on Tuesday, February 14, 2017 in

d'VersePoetsPub-- Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsThe pussy is the portalinto another world(that was Kubrick's observation)so come with memy squiggly little brotherthe journey is arduousand fraught with perilbut would you rather languish hereand be just another jerkoff?On the couchfeet propped uphead tilted backThe Outlaw Bible of Poetryresting on my lapJazz zonked outbeside mefan whirring awayin the cornerkeeping us both "cool"He likes to rest his headon my yellow padsayin' screw your fleeting ideasI go...

TURN BACK TOMORROW by Tim Schaefer...Kindle edi...

content discovered on Wednesday, February 8, 2017 in

Hey kids, just wanted to let you know that you can download the Kindle edition of my new novel, Turn Back Tomorrow, for FREE today through February 12th only! This is the e-book version of my totally ADULT time travel thriller that sells for eleven bucks on Amazon. All I ask in return is that when you've completed the book, please consider giving it an honest review on my Amazon book page. Reviews are what make or break a book. Thanks! Love ya!(Sorry, links aren't working, for some reason. Just go to ama...

TURN BACK TOMORROW by Tim Schaefer--available f...

content discovered on Friday, February 3, 2017 in

Excerpt from Turn Back Tomorrow:There was so much to learn about her--so many questions. In a way, he still felt like this was a fantasy--that the lot of them could very well be mentally unstable and this whole flying saucer business no more than a delusion they shared. But to be a total skeptic, here and now, with all that had passed before his eyes--a beloved president and a civil rights leader gunned down, Watergate, Vietnam, hanky-panky in the oval office--one would have to be delusional to blindly a...

COMING BACK FOR MORE

content discovered on Thursday, January 12, 2017 in

1.Her exterior has been religiously anointedher interior is exquisitely appointedbut I've come to the conclusionupon eons of self-delusionthat the solitary life works bestfor the constitutionas all about there's prostitutionin one guise or anotherso be my sistahand I'll be your brutherfor us there will no othertill my hour is upand you're off to your next callcounting your haul as you slink out the door2.Decades whiz byin the flash of an eyeand when I say I took her support stockings offand wore them ove...

PATIO PARTY

content discovered on Monday, January 9, 2017 in

I.I meet her at the party.She is working for an agencycalled Asians For Special Occasions,renting herself out to PC folks who wanttheir social gatherings to appear culturally diverse.I ask if she has done many similar events,and she replies, "Oh, yes. in fact when yousee a Japanese, or Chinese, or Korean, orVietnamese, or Thai-looking person at aparty these days, they are likely from the agency."(She isn't supposedto drink the wine,but I say here,you can suck on mine.)II.There is a young middle-tier porn...

THE REVOLUTION WILL BE TELEVISED

content discovered on Monday, January 2, 2017 in

Wish I could decideon some kind of compromisebetween lying around on my dead buttand leading the revolutionShould be a happy mediumthat won't get me shotand turn me into a martyryet still provide a modicumof intrigue and excitement(like leading a bus tour of celebrity homes in L.A.)Though a martyr wouldn't besuch a bad thing to bewith my picture on a T-shirt(just have to grow my beard out bushy)And I gotta admit the romantic visionof taking to the hills with our riflesand our long-haired women--little pa...

HEARTBREAK IN FADED JEANS

content discovered on Saturday, December 17, 2016 in

I like it when a poem mentions a real placelike Omaha or Charleston as that immediatelytells me there won't be any faeries or elves in itand so it's safe to continue and I like it whena poem mentions a real thing like maybe a busstop where a woman is waiting for a bus thatdoesn't come and I like it when a poem mentionsreal people like old lovers or new lovers and someway that all these things come together like at a busstop in Omaha where a woman stands waiting forwhat could be an old lover on a bus that...

RUN

content discovered on Sunday, December 11, 2016 in

My first baseball game second grade I believe recess out on the playground they didn't use a baseball it was a soccer sized ball you whacked at it with the bat and then you ran that's what I saw the other kids do you ran I didn't know one thing aboutbaseball I didn't know you were supposed to stopat the base when the ball was being thrown there andsomeone called out SAFE! or OUT! mom's Second Big Mistake having shown me nothing 'bout anything 'cept how to be passive aggressive so I just ...

Last Tango In Timbuktu

content discovered on Wednesday, December 7, 2016 in

BRING A GRIN TO THE FACE OF THAT LOVER OF LITERATURE WITH A QUIRKY SENSE OF HUMOR ON YOUR XMAS SHOPPING LIST...

A WOMAN'S SCENT...FADING

content discovered on Saturday, November 26, 2016 in

Imaginary Gardens With Real Toads A worldly young man, tainted by love, railing against the ruling classes, (promising a chicken in every pot but offering a payday loan joint on every corner) drives down a lonely road. The snow beyond the windows impenetrable. The wind whipping across the park. In his mind's ear:flute music played by street musicians from Chile-- portable lives in the nomadic sun. He hears: The war drums of the Sioux. He hears: The voice of God singing "Hey Jude." He w...

ALLIED (2016)

content discovered on Saturday, November 26, 2016 in

Rated: RSTARS: Brad Pitt, Marion CotillardDIRECTOR: Robert ZemeckisGENRE: Drama/Action-Adventure/RomanceAlliedhas a little something for everybody. Action...adventure...intrigue...espionage...suspense... romance...and the eye candy of Brad Pitt and Marion Cotillard. (So I guess they can be forgiven for not coming up with a more imaginative title.)Pitt is Canadian intelligence officer Max Vatan. Cotillard is French resistance fighter Marianne Beausejour (don't make me spell that name again). Eye candy mee...

IT'S YESTERDAY ONCE MORE (.doo-be-doo-lang-lang...

content discovered on Friday, November 11, 2016 in

Goin backto a simpler time and placewhere at the tablethe family says graceand father knows bestA place where climate changedoes not existand those greenhouse gas emissionslike the truthneed no regulatin'Back to a time whereher right to choosemeans which pretty dressin the storefront display windowshe will wrap up and take homeWhere if we all just stay healthythere'll be no needfor that costly insurancejust make sure to getyour morning constitutionalin every dayAnd speaking of the constitutionwell, that ...

NIGHT OF MY WRETCHEDNESS

content discovered on Saturday, October 29, 2016 in

Because you need to be somewhereBecause you need to be doing somethingBecause it's neither here nor thereExcept for how it makes you feelWhen you stop to think about itThough you think too much about itAnd in the end it doesn't makeA pitiable bit of differenceIf you even think about it at allCuz you gotta be somewhereAll the timeThinking about it or notTotal slug or geniusYou are still gonna be right HERE(don't try to be thereyou can't be THEREcuz I'M thereand no two bodies can occupy the same spaceat th...

KOKURA

content discovered on Friday, October 21, 2016 in

d'Verse Poets PubOn a quiet August morningin Kokuraa child plays absentmindedlyin the streetas the plane passesway up high.The skies have turned cloudywhen only minutes agothey'd been clearand a snap determination is made--too overcast to make the delivery.On that quiet August morninganother child plays distractedlyin the streetof the alternate target.The weather cooperatesand Fat Manlike his predecessor Little Boyis delivered.One child survivesand grows to be an old manwho still speaks of"The Luck of Ko...

SHE

content discovered on Thursday, October 6, 2016 in

dVerse Poets PubShe superimposes his faceupon her own demonscuz it ain't easy to beat the shitout of a nameless, faceless entity,and a punching bagis always more therapeuticwhen it's someone you love.She knowsthat he will absorb the blows--bounce back grinningto a standing eight count,no worse for the wear.Knowing in his knightly heartwhat she still struggles to comprehend.That the Devil made her do it.

AMERICA

content discovered on Tuesday, September 20, 2016 in

Imainary Garden With Real Toadsover at da Wally storeda peeps dey waddle inan' den dey waddle outan' dat just de employeescuz everybody fatin Americafatter den me big fat catin Americaeverybody eat goodin Americacompare to where me come fromwhere many say: "Food? What is dat?"in America me see dis guy on tvhe cram down seventy hot dogsjust to set some kind of recordyeah, me REALLY see datwhere me come fromdey would call dat obscenebut it okay in Americawhere all da fat cats be gettin' fatterfatter den me...

VAGABOND

content discovered on Tuesday, September 6, 2016 in

Imaginary Garden With Real Toadsthe only thing he can say for surethe only thing the irrefutable evidence points tois that she loves wanderingmore than any person, place, or thingand anyone who wishes to curry favor with hermust first scroll to read the terms and conditionsand click on I accept before proceedingit just goes with the territoryor provincewhere she may materializeat any particular timein betweenshe's a caged catpacing back and forthback and forthwaitingstillhe's happy he gets to rockher Gyp...

AND SO ON

content discovered on Tuesday, August 23, 2016 in

Imaginary Garden With Real ToadsNo one is crazyabout a poemthat goes onand onand onand onand onand onand onand so on(we all got places to go and people to do!)A poem should belike a good fight with your girlfriend.Say itsuccinctlyhave it mean somethingmake it feel like a stab in the heartand get out of there.Come back later.Approach cautiouslyand take a peekto see if "she" still looks friendly.Then dress her up a littleand get readyfor her big debutwith your friends!

TRACE IT BACK

content discovered on Tuesday, August 16, 2016 in

Imaginary Garden With Real Toads Nature procreatesmindlesslywith no regard for the numbersor the consequences.I know some peeps like that too.Bathing in their own pious disregard--the stink of the river still on them,as Gaia's icy tearscascade into the sea.And I thought I heard her whisper:There's only one of me...but far too many of you.

OLD BEATER

content discovered on Wednesday, August 10, 2016 in

When I reach the endof that roadI'll be like some of those old carsI used to drive aroundheld together by chewing gumand bailing wirean old beater(I know what you're thinkin')limpin' alongchokin' and coughin' and splutterin'(but never out of "gas")destined for some boneyardto be gutted for spare parts

UNNOTICED

content discovered on Tuesday, August 2, 2016 in

Imaginary Garden With Real Toads They slip bydaybydaybydaythat is life's little trickas you're not supposed to noticetill one day you glancein the mirrorand reel back in HORRORthen you hear somebody laughingyou can't see thembut that is LIFEgetting such a kick out ofpulling that shiton some hapless sonofabitchonce again

FISH IN A BARREL

content discovered on Friday, June 17, 2016 in

You remember the wild westwhere everybody was a gunslingerand when the bad guys came to townan armed citizenry had somerecourse to deal with 'emI had a visionof a new Americamuch like the old Americawhere east is westand west is westin the new wild westWhere pistol packin' mamasare toting something more than lipstickand Tic Tacs in their bag--and they know how to use itCuz a shootoutis better than a massacreany daypardnerOr would you rather be fish in a barrel?You know as well as Ithat day is comin'there...

ARE U FLASHING GANG SIGNS AT ME OR ARE U JUST S...

content discovered on Sunday, June 5, 2016 in

Dem goddamn blueberries when dey fallwhen dey fall...Dad deserves the best--get him some newjockey shorts, but beware--he'll be pissedif they're a size too small,so sneak into his room when he's sleepingwith a tape measure.Dem blueberries when dey tumbleoff da 'frigerator shelf...I confess what I've had bottled up inside mefor all this time is that...goddamned Santa Claus,he never brought me NUTHIN' I really liked.(Would you believe I had a mild form ofTourette's--"Saint Vitus Dance" they used to call it...

A SHORT PLAY...ON WORDS (or "Eat Shit And Die")

content discovered on Thursday, June 2, 2016 in

Imaginary Garden With Real Toads THE SCENE: A fast food drive-through somewhere in middle America CHARACTERS: SHE: A young female order taker HE: A male customer who has just pulled up to the intercom SHE: Hello, and welcome to SHITBURGER. How may I help you?HE: Uh... I guess I'll have a SHITBURGER with everything on it.SHE: You want the works on that, you say?HE: I think...what kind of shit does ...

A SHORT PLAY...ON WORDS

content discovered on Tuesday, May 31, 2016 in

Imaginary Garden With Real Toads THE SCENE: A fast food drive-through somewhere in middle America CHARACTERS: SHE: A young female order taker HE: A male customer who has just pulled up to the intercom SHE: Hello, and welcome to SHITBURGER. How may I help you?HE: Uh... I guess I'll have a SHITBURGER with everything on it.SHE: You want the works on that, you say?HE: I think...what kind of shit does ...


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